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Should you sleep after a fight with your partner?

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Should you sleep after a fight with your partner?


No matter how much you love your partner, there will be times when you won’t agree with him. Sometimes disagreements lead to arguments and then huge fights. You can’t really control the time or day or place when that happens. But if it’s after dinner and before you go to bed then it can be a problem. A lot of things can happen if you go to sleep angry after a fight. You might not be able to get a good night’s sleep, among other things. And they can affect your health, so try not to go to bed angry.

HealthShots connected with Dr Arijit Bose, psychologist, RN Tagore Hospital, Kolkata, to talk about sleeping after a fight.

sleeping after fight
Going to bed angry is not good. Image courtesy: Adobe Stock

Things that can happen if you sleep after a fight

There are many reasons why you should avoid going to bed angry. Here’s what can happen if you go to bed feeling sour.

1. Anger can fester

If you go to bed angry after a fight, the negative emotions that you experienced during the argument may continue to brew and fester overnight, say the expert. When you wake up, you might feel even angrier than you did the night before. This can only make it harder to find a resolution.

2. It can lead to resentment

If you don’t talk things out before you go to bed, you might start to resent your partner. Resentment can build up over time and lead to further arguments and problems in the future.

3. You might not get a good night’s sleep

It can affect your quality of sleep. When you’re angry or upset, it can be difficult to fall asleep and stay asleep. If you are lying in bed thinking about the argument and what you could have said or done, you might have trouble drifting off and staying asleep. Counting sleep will also not help.

4. It can damage your relationship

If you go to bed without resolving the issue, it can damage your relationship with your partner. Lack of communication and understanding can create a rift between you, which can be hard to repair, says Dr Bose.

5. The problem won’t go away

It’s true that ignoring a problem won’t make it vanish. In fact, it’s more likely to make the situation worse. If you don’t address the issue before you go to bed, it will still be there in the morning.

sleeping after fight
You might not be able to get a good night’s sleep. Image courtesy: Shutterstock

Tips to try to sleep when you are angry

You might try your best to resolve things, but if that doesn’t happen and if you have trouble sleeping, follow these tips:

1. Listen to calming music

Music has health benefits too, but pick calming songs that can help soothe your mind and help you to relax. Leave the fast-paced songs for your workout sessions.

2. Take deep breaths

The expert says that taking slow and deep breaths can help you calm your body and reduce the physical symptoms of anger, such as an increased heart rate.

3. Practice meditation or mindfulness

Meditation or mindfulness can help you to focus on the present moment and reduce feelings of anger and stress.

4. Use relaxation techniques

Techniques such as progressive muscle relaxation or visualisation can help you to relax your body and mind, making it easier to fall asleep.

You can also write down your thoughts and express your anger through written words. So, maintaining a diary could be a good idea.



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